It Don’t Suck!

Normally not sucking would be a good thing, but when it comes to a vacuum cleaner, not sucking is a bad thing.

My better half asked me to vacuum this morning while she was at work. She claims it was an innocent request, but I’m not too sure about it now.

Last week we installed new carpet in a rent house of ours and she took it over there and vacuumed the heck out of it. Turns out it completely blocked the hose leading to the removable container. There was wads and wads of carpet fibers stuffed in the hose.

Me being Mr Fix-it, thought it would be a simple job to clean out all the fibers. First I stuck my fingers in as far as possible and removed big hunking wads of carpet. Then I attempted to blow out the rest of it with my air compressor. That didn’t work. So my next bright idea was to use my shop vac to suck out the fibers. Got a bit more, but not much.

Okaaaaay, now what?

I know, I’ll stick something down the hose and try to push it out. Tried a shoving down a 1/2″ pvc pipe. That just compacted it more. Wait, I have a plumbing snake, let’s try that! Got some trace fibers out but that was it. Damn if I was going to let this silly hose lick me. I looked around my still messy shop, but didn’t see anything promising.

Bing! How about water pressure? Took the hose outside and stuck a water hose down it and turned on the water full blast. A few more clumps came out, but there was a hard mess still in the very middle. Hmm, this is getting to be very frustrating. Looked around the shop once more and my eyes lit upon some f-clamps.F_CLAMPS

I stuck the bar end down the hose and with a twisting motion and a few curse words under my breath, managed to finally break through the hard clump of carpet fibers. Pulled out the clamp and a few fibers came out, but not near enough. Okay, let’s try it again, and again, and again, and just for good measure, once again. A few fibers each time, but that was it.

Do I admit defeat? Do I run to the store and buy another vacuum before my better half gets home? Do I grab a saw to cut the damn hose in half? Nope, but I must admit I did seriously think of doing each of those.

What to do, what to do?

Wait a minute, the f-clamp obviously loosened up the hard clump, so why not try the water hose trick once more? A few hard shoves and it finally broke free. Laughing like a loon, I waved the hose around with water shooting through it. Good thing I don’t have any close neighbors or they probably would have called the men in white suits to come over with a straitjacket.

Now the hose is in my shop drying out and I’ll put the vacuum back together tomorrow. Lesson to all you husbands out there, when the wife asks you to do something that she normally does, then most likely the equipment she uses is NOT WORKING correctly. Don’t wait until the last minute to do the task. Go check out the vacuum, dryer, or whatnot immediately!

By the way, the vacuum should suck rather nicely now.

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